1. |
Chartreuse
04:08
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not a soul you said
little notice
wearing a cardigan again
whistleblowing
chartreuse, jealous and scared
chartreuse
lost my wallet, pissed my pants
linking intense, something bored
all of my friends
waste for the nothing new
wasted love affair
yes and never said
grease a noble sentry
like a militant
you don't even flinch
you won't even say
you don't know if you love
chartreu love
well, we don't move
innocent again
sanitation incoming
we left our dignity in the bathroom
the sun shone into red
having no alternative
we were linking so intense
there was something bored again
we were born again
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2. |
NRX Rx (BwO Version)
03:44
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typical reaction
a basilisk
correction: it's all in your head
typical inaction
a choice between:
two bikes, two bars and a bed
typical abstraction
a limosine
a head detached on the ground
typical collection
of half-formed thoughts
and tossed-off quotes
a paucity of light
typical erection
a litmus test
of if the film is any good
typical induction
the proof is lost
it's gone, it's all up in flames
typical seduction
a magazine, a poster
a sponge and a couch
typical inflection
like kerosene
a small town
and a lack of something to do
most times
it hits the flowline
the indigent needs
catalogue the scene
for future referendums
passed without hope
an ichor to fight
with or without bulbs
a tuber in the basement
stately statements
delivered with care
carrion impaired
the impulse bell is aching
sick and snaking
along 'round the bend
sin and find a friend
to leave far behind
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3. |
Yearbook
04:19
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last class choked up couldn't read
they all looked and it planted a thought
that I'd never be right
(wrote you a note)
keep fighting it's an adequate mode
(gave it a look)
in a which to cope and not grow
(put it away)
but we did it all wrong
(it wasn't for you)
(was it for me?)
last class fell asleep in my hands
(the sentences there)
they all looked, couldn't undermine my plans
(to frame it as love)
to stay up all night
(so it doesn't hurt)
(picked up the note)
sent you a message at 3:45
(put it away)
my game froze and I threw up on the floor
(it wasn't the time)
did it all wrong
(to tell it all)
last call for an obvious joke
do what you will
it won't be relevant for at least 3 years
then it'll be worse than ever before
(wrote you a note)
last chance to slip in all your jabs
(gave it a look)
the bell rings in an hour and that's a wrap
(put it away)
so shut off the tape
(it wasn't for you)
too little too much for anyone else
(was it for me?)
last flash of a memory lapse
(the sentences there)
you're out of mana and all tapped out
(to frame it as love)
so just grind all the rails
(so it doesn't hurt)
collect horse cause the timer's almost out
(picked up the note)
last dip in your ex-friend's pool
(put it away)
it's not cold, but it's the next best thing
(it wasn't the time)
just give up the ghost
(to tell it all)
and hop in the banshee, we already lost
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4. |
Lisa
02:56
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(hey)
thinking 'bout you
(wait)
feeling out you
(hey)
thinking what to
(say)
thinking a lot
incorrect assigned
giving up the best shot that I'd taken
pictured all the lines
read between until it came together
fizzled out my mind
credit card in pieces aside the cabinet
looked me in the mouth
shouted out my tonsils that I'd called it wrong
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5. |
New Year's Reunion
03:53
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lost all my friends like ta-da
while I was wide awake
fresh out the hospital bed
sheets slipping from the sky
reminds me of my little friend
say "hi" don't close your eyes
it was a place where we could cry
had it all that night when he held me in his arms
all is forgiven, all is forgot
only took a few more years
to scrub the ink from off the spot
lost all my sense like ta-da
while I was fast asleep
fresh out the ok corral
fake standoff made it seem-
reminds me of some scene
say "bye-- don't go away"
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6. |
Dog Dare
03:10
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it al began with some friend whispering
a task set out for you
crowded halls and neck sweat blistering
"to do, to do"
little feet crushed flat like wrecking balls
a buzzer at your side
it is never something somebody else wanted
for you to do
laying backwards by the train tracks
an acquaintance's ex-girlfriend
or wait, maybe she's his girlfriend
we constructed all these rules
it was a task set out for you
things to do, to do
open mouth is far off limits
but the words could say all that they wanted
peanut butter hides the small of alcohol
or at least that is what you told me
while you hold me hostage
slack-jawed in a basement
kissing your friend on a pool table
I was getting high and unable
to take notes in the bathroom
while my friend just lay passed out along the floor
when I found out what you'd done that night
my parents held me hostage
lying naked in my basement with a bottle by my side
I guess I cried
and a piece of me was lost forever
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7. |
Snow Day
03:56
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it's hard to come to a reasonable conclusion
when the thoughts that stay are so unreasonable
the images that flash cut like knives right through me
and make me want to jump into a gaping hole
the hole is warm and wet / the walls they taste like snow
the dirty kind that sticks onto the mottled curb
outside the house in which the images took hold
and when the cars pull through, we had to stop the game
I wanna know, I wanna go homeward
bound and gagged and left alone
I don't know if I'll ever feel ok
ever again
you held me when I needed a friend
or an end to something small
like a life that I'm in
it's a crime to live like that
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8. |
Fucking
04:11
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I wish that you would change
I wish that you would stay the same
I wish that you would give it another go
I wish that you would cry
I wish that you would lie to my face
I wish that you would give it another go
I wish that you swim
a thousand miles in my direction
I wish that you give it another go
sometimes I pine over broken engagements
sometimes I pettily hold all of your grudges
for you, until you want them back
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9. |
Sunset with Dan
03:50
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I was not alone when you told me so
I was born with a canyon in my mouth
there are nothings in the place
I was left with a right hand full of salt
there are nothings in the face
of the-
I was born with a chasm in my mouth
I was left with a right hand full of change
to change is love
I was told that a friendship never stops
I was right when they said the signs were there
and there
but I was blind and deaf and sad
I was smart in the sense that I got out
I was wrong in the sense that I was in
like in the first place
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10. |
17
03:45
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17 and fucked for life
my indigestion wrought a field of branching veins
civilized but an open book
a pastiche-laden trope deceived about how to feel
silicone and open eyes
a paralyzing glance at things that no one should hear
incorrect but doubled down
on glances up the stream beside a babbling old man
it's a point of view
which you knew
something right
cause a stir
in a flash
dance and smash
all the lights
which you knew
it's alright
sleep all day in filthy twine
the record books all say that you've been dead for a while
crib a liner note from dad
the intermittent sounds just mean the battery is low
eat a sandwich 'fore she wakes
the sun will kiss the sand before the wrist marks heal
take a page out of this book
just don't forget to cross - just don't forget the part
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11. |
Sleep + Mutual Aid
04:45
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I went to bed
but I woke up instead
and I lied about where I'd been
sometimes we lie
and sometimes we go back to sleep
went down to the sunday morning
left my tickets on the path
realistically it's monday
ticket stubs now turned to ash
went down to the tuesday drive-in
lot was empty 'cept for ted
gave his tickets to the bellboy
he, in turn, sold them to ed
went down to the wednesday special
2-for-2 unless you ask
woke up and it turned to friday
skynyrd may have had a point
April 5th and 7th fumbling
green and yellow march ahead
violet was the better singer
76 guns and you're-
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the soft form dissolves Brooklyn, New York
Ridgewood NY | solo artist | psychoanalyst | post-post-new-sincerity lo-fi sadcore
IG: @thesoftformdissolves
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